Unfortunately, I just went through some old emails and as a result, I just feel like a complete and total idiot. Some of the things I read, I couldn't believe I said, other things I couldn't believe was said to me, and some stuff just brought out some really bad and hurtful memories.
Growing up, I've been quick to find things in life "inferior". I always felt that if the world was my way, things would be so much better. Till this day, I have an easily agitated personality. However, going through my past really opened up my eyes to the fact that even I wouldn't want to listen to me. I feel so much regret to the events that have taken place in my life. I always had such big dreams, but have always come up short.
If I could go back and do it over, I would do it so differently.
But is it just me? Am I the only one who regrets their past? Was my immaturity something that other people go through as well?
All I know is that I sure felt better about myself before reading the emails. I've been finding myself trying to escape my past. How can I get closure from it all?
I hope that moving forward, I can take what I've learned from my past and use it to become a better person. I know that my trials and tribulations can work for me if used wisely. But the questions is, how will I feel about me 20 years from now? ...If only I had a time machine...
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